What is effective Communication

Effective communication is not just about speaking, it’s also about being able to listen to your audience.  It takes place when there is a mutual understanding between parties and happens when those involved have an ability to influence with the aim of creating successful outcomes or agreement amongst parties. 

The good news is; successful communication is a skill which can be learned by anyone who is willing to appreciate its foundations.  By embracing effective communication skills, we have the ability to comprehend others as well as be understood, which assists in building relationships.  This can lead to the ability to persuade others to see our point of view or understand our message.  Other benefits of effective communication include the ability to convey what we do and why, development of our career, ability to achieve our goals, and the list goes on.

If we think about successful people we know, what is the one denominator they all have in common?  Successful world leaders, managers, colleagues, singers, community leaders, to name a few examples, are strong communicators who connect and influence others.  They reach out to their audience and convey a message that demonstrates their understanding and appeals to their followers.  Based on this platform, successful people can speak with power and influence, with the ability to persuade others to follow their lead.

For example, it is known Barack Obama was able to win Presidency of the United States by communicating and making a strong connection with voters across every level.  He was able to gain strong support by:

• Understanding the key issues for the American people.
• Demonstrating he was aware of the issues and would tackle them as President.
• Establishing strong values and integrity throughout the campaign by sticking to the key issues.  For example, he didn’t get pulled into tactics played by the opposition and rarely referred to race throughout the campaign.
• Utilizing different communication channels that appealed to many voters such as Facebook.

Consequently, people were able to vote for Barack Obama with confidence, resulting in a convincing win.

As Stephen Covey, renowned, international leadership expert said, ‘Seek first to understand, then to be understood.’ Barack Obama is a great example of how effective communication is not just about talking, it’s also about listening to and understanding the audience’s needs and appealing to those needs.    

Remember, you have the power to change the results you are getting in your life. It’s up to you to take ownership of your thoughts and actions to achieve your desired results.

There is no such thing as mistakes; only feedback as to what to do next

Embracing the unknown is where the opportunities for endless growth and development lie.  However, many of us find reasons to hold ourselves back from trying new ideas or thoughts due to fear of making mistakes.  By not giving ourselves permission to try something new, and potentially making an error, we lose the opportunity to understand both positive and negative learning, vital for achieving our ultimate goals. 

If an outcome from doing something new is negative, it’s realising it’s about accepting feedback, which turns into an opportunity to learn and grow.  Kevin Blanchard, author of One Minute Manager and management expert says, ‘Feedback is the breakfast of champions.’  Even the most successful people like Bill Gates and Richard Branson have made what might be seen as mistakes, but they also view them as invaluable feedback.  They learn what to avoid, what not to do, and narrow down the possibilities to use next time.  Or they discover brilliant new opportunities in the process.

Thomas Edison failed over 10,000 times before creating the light bulb.  He saw what others would call failed attempts as more than 10,000 possibilities of refining and narrowing his search for a solution.  Christopher Columbus failed on his mission to navigate his way to India, but instead, he discovered America.  Successful people know taking educated risks and embracing the unknown will possibly not get the results they wanted, but in the act of doing so, they will potentially grow and prosper.

In fact, experts say there is no such thing as failure only feedback.  Imagine reframing what was perceived as a mistake to; ‘there is only learning and growth from positive and negative feedback, which puts us on the ultimate path to success.’  So when you perceive you’ve failed at something, consider the following:

• Recognize you might make errors when trying new possibilities carried out with the best intention.
• Acceptance of responsibility for making mistakes makes learning possible.
• You can’t change mistakes, but you can respond by assessing what worked, what didn’t and how you could approach it differently next time.
• Growth occurs when you see opportunity for improvement and take action to create change for the better

Theodore Roosevelt, former US president said that it’s not the critic that counts, who points out another’s failings.  He says credit belongs to the person who puts in the effort, who may fail over and over again, but all their devotion and energy goes towards a worthy cause with great enthusiasm.  And if they fail, they do it while they are daring to be courageous and can never be in the ‘camp of the timid’ who neither know victory or defeat.  By taking action in the areas of the unknown and learning from our mistakes, we gain knowledge and potentially become aware of new opportunities.

Remember, you have the power to change the results you are getting in your life. It’s all up to you to take ownership of your thoughts and actions to achieve your desired results.

Stepping out of our comfort zone: the key to personal growth

Our comfort zone is all about what we know. It’s a place where we believe we are safe and feel most comfortable. It’s the area in our lives where we don’t sense a risk of undergoing change which might create uneasiness or fear. Although the reality is, we might be in more danger staying in this zone, because we are not aware of other, better potential possibilities, which can enhance or bring joy to our lives. By staying within our safety net of comfort, we potentially deny ourselves a more fulfilling way of life.

Breaking out of our comfort zone to create greater learning can sometimes be likened to a child. They are living happily at home with people they love, trust and know, and one day, they experience their first day at school. They are introduced to so many new, potentially overwhelming things which are hitting all their senses; a new regime, a new playground with lots of children they may have never met before, taking instruction from an unknown ‘authority’, a bombardment of different noises, and a new routine of when to eat, play and pay attention. This can be intimidating, and although some children will embrace these changes, others will protest and want to go back where they believe they are safe. In hindsight, we know going to school is about getting used to new sights, sounds and feelings, and this is where we learn and become equipped to take on future challenges in this world.

So, like a child on their first day of school, when we move closer to the boundaries of our comfort zone, we may feel insecure, confused, fearful or even excited about new learning challenges. When we do experience these feelings, we may want to retreat back into the familiar and forgo the chance to discover more about ourselves and the world around us. Alternatively, if we choose to embrace uncertainty and make fear our friend, it gives us courage to step into the unknown onto a path of great learning. Courage enables trust: trust that no matter what the outcome, as a result of stepping into the unknown, we’ve done our best at that time. And reflection enables us to determine what worked, what didn’t and how we can alter our approach with the view of doing better next time.

American leadership author, Max DePree quotes, ‘We cannot become what we want to be by remaining what we are.’ That’s why true leaders, successful people, people willing to embrace life, will welcome fear or confusion, because they know when they are challenged and take action, it leads to growth, no matter what the outcome is. They understand the invaluable, positive lessons from attempts to stretch themselves beyond what they know, even if they do make mistakes.

Remember, you have the power to change the results you are getting in your life. It’s up to you to take ownership of your thoughts and actions to achieve your desired results.